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Life after a life together.......

Some people reading this will be commencing the very challenging and overwhelming journey into 'singledom'. This can only be described as an 'emotional roller coaster ride and this is the time when you need to start getting used to living outside 'the habit' that your life has been for the last 20,30 plus years.

Firstly, once the shock has settled and you take time to think about YOU, try to remember your uniqueness and what makes you the fabulous person you forgot you where! as over time this may have faded into significance in your family life. Dig it back up and remember the little things that make you shine.

As I have said in previous blogs, divorce, especially after many years as a couple/family can leave you with a feeling of grieving and a sense of loss but like the advise we give others in times of 'loss', time will heal and it really does and as each week goes by you actually start to think to yourself .....WOW this week I don't feel such a deep pain in these weeks you should make yourself busy to keep your mind occupied on other things and also do one thing special for yourself everyday that you did not do during your relationship......take 10 minutes to:

Listen to some songs/tunes from when you were young that made you happy as music is very uplifting, turn it up and have a boogie (I find Candi Staton - young hearts run free, does it for me all the time)

Call a friend that you have lost touch with (maybe your partner did not get on with them)

Break out of the old routine and do one thing different every day (drive home a different way from the same road for 20 or 30 years, change your morning routine

Write down one thing every day that your divorce has freed you up to do and also what it has liberated you from

Make some plans

join a group

Volunteer or help a friend

And lastly for this blog, let any regrets or bitterness go ........ what ifs/if only's are normal for a certain period of time but will not help you feel any better.

Now is the time to learn from your past experience and prepare for the next exciting chapter in your life.


Divorce Recovery Workshop is a self-help course that will help people deal with the emotional trauma of a relationship that has broken down. The workshop will help you to understand what you are going through, provide support from others in the same situation and help you adjust to your new status. It is complimentary to any professional help and support you may be receiving. We do not provide legal advice or formal counselling.

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