We got this lovely message from our new client, and she agreed that she would be very happy for us to share her thoughts as long as we changed her name - which we would always do for confidentiality purposes.
Testimonial, Sarah aged 59, Hampshire
I got married at 19, and after nearly 36 years of marriage, in June 2019, my husband passed away after a long illness. I guess it’s always a shock to lose someone, but he was gone a long time before he died. I had nursed him for 5 years before he passed, so it didn’t feel like a shock for me as we were prepared for it.
Of course, the pandemic came along eight or nine months later, and the loneliness was horrendous; even though I had been doing everything on my own for a long time before my husband died, this was different. I can’t remember ever feeling that alone. I kept thinking that I should get myself out there, but obviously, we were locked down, although I do think that also offered a good excuse for me not even having to think of venturing out on a date with someone.
In the summer of 2022, I finally plucked up the courage to attend a few Select Events’ socials for singles over 50. I did this for a few months, which helped my confidence in meeting new people. With their help, I decided to take the leap of faith to join and become a member to see if they could find me, someone.
It took a few weeks to get me up and running, and I lost my nerve a few times!. The best thing was that they have a very supportive service and they are also very thorough. They guided me through the process at my pace, and we had lots of conversations about what I was looking for and what I actually needed from a partner. They were great at asking questions, allowing me to get to the really important things about the relationship I wanted moving forward. I liked the fact that they did this through a face-to-face meeting.
Things then took off quickly; after that, I had my photo shoot, which I was nervous about as I disliked getting my photos taken, but the Select photographer was so lovely and made me feel at ease. I then had a coaching session on zoom which was an eye-opener as the coach was able to ask all the right questions for me to open up about my apprehensions about myself and dating and relationships in general. She put a plan in place for me and some exercises for me to use when I start dating. The great thing is that I know their coach is on hand if I have a wobble or lose my nerve.
My profile was written, and we discussed this several times, and I was able to choose my images from my photoshoot. That was a relief having it all done for me, as I could never have done it myself.
I have been on 3 dates since I joined, I am learning a lot along the way, and I have adapted (with the help of my matchmaker) my approach to dating. The team at Select have supported me all the way. It hasn’t been an easy journey, and I think this was because I was looking for something that is no longer possible to find, and I doubted myself in many ways.
Now, I feel more confident, and with the help of Select Connections’ coach, I have developed a more positive dating approach. I am actually enjoying the experience of meeting new people and being myself. I’m confident that they will help me find my new companion. If I was to do it all again or if anyone were to ask about it, I would say be brave and take the step – you never know where it may lead.